tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-67015283709635223842024-03-13T14:52:34.953-04:00THE ISLAND OF MISFIT VINYLThe Untamed Squidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16674015797525475434noreply@blogger.comBlogger133125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6701528370963522384.post-80931572145845919562011-05-02T23:11:00.002-04:002011-05-02T23:15:10.411-04:00STARRING CHRIS FARLEY AS "TER"<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgCEFDGICnry_RVtasL8LaiCOxEcalF6Kn8XpKS7uf0UhzXOI0rq1BM3xHvhNFTqSOxNwq-grlrfuKGRCrxMyhHU7xfbvXu68dWvwznJd9rkTKXqrccaT99tTx4h8po81mjRceQP5Ub5Uk/s1600/ddrifterspolkanfun.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5602322748450083234" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 398px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 400px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgCEFDGICnry_RVtasL8LaiCOxEcalF6Kn8XpKS7uf0UhzXOI0rq1BM3xHvhNFTqSOxNwq-grlrfuKGRCrxMyhHU7xfbvXu68dWvwznJd9rkTKXqrccaT99tTx4h8po81mjRceQP5Ub5Uk/s400/ddrifterspolkanfun.jpg" border="0" /></a><br /><br /><div>I don’t know what’s worse. Having to wear Abba’s hand-me-downs on the cover of your album, or having to promote yourself by scrawling your band name on your bare chests. Especially if your band name sounds like Stuttering John introducing “Under the Boardwalk.” Oh wait, I know what’s worse. Being fat enough to be the guy with <strong><em>three</em></strong> fucking letters.</div>The Untamed Squidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16674015797525475434noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6701528370963522384.post-55110394009957923812011-04-18T23:05:00.002-04:002011-04-18T23:13:34.137-04:00FINISH YOUR BRUSSEL SPROUTS OR THIS HORSE GETS IT<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj4N5L52wV4yniYQkQ-29z6s3UAPWjg0cg67jkqQlraKy3dLWsGdOAZPzuOnkVwhrMumQ0qO0DiByDUT8AupXwgyO55K9GBou59d5WLgC-HG6rEOIV5K7bwc8LOTmAcYBjOXLmcXifEILA/s1600/dorothy.bmp"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5597126030669730386" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 399px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 400px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj4N5L52wV4yniYQkQ-29z6s3UAPWjg0cg67jkqQlraKy3dLWsGdOAZPzuOnkVwhrMumQ0qO0DiByDUT8AupXwgyO55K9GBou59d5WLgC-HG6rEOIV5K7bwc8LOTmAcYBjOXLmcXifEILA/s400/dorothy.bmp" border="0" /></a> <br /><div>Hey boys, come on in and make yourself at home! I made some chocolate chip cookies, and there’s a <strong><em>dee-licious</em></strong> shoo fly pie comin’ out of the oven if you can wait about twenty minutes. Tell you what, you boys stay here and watch TV. I gotta go out and put down a horse and then shoot a couple of whores who put the moves on Paw last weekend at the bingo hall. And remember, shoes <strong><em>off </em></strong>the coffee table!</div>The Untamed Squidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16674015797525475434noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6701528370963522384.post-91122668592659027482011-04-07T20:37:00.002-04:002011-04-07T20:42:00.688-04:00GATOR BAIT<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhcQFQtBKOlelwb65p5YqLrrdWCd3ZixWiEbqMcLGlsk57BHYMKYCzxFmYSUB5AD5XpwDCUybO7ReXcYsic164ayHuwQq2gBSsMjixVIsnw8aw5Bs9wW-ZeAdtZm7xRXcz1NZhjB8Md72g/s1600/donnie+saxe.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5593005892480132562" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 399px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhcQFQtBKOlelwb65p5YqLrrdWCd3ZixWiEbqMcLGlsk57BHYMKYCzxFmYSUB5AD5XpwDCUybO7ReXcYsic164ayHuwQq2gBSsMjixVIsnw8aw5Bs9wW-ZeAdtZm7xRXcz1NZhjB8Md72g/s400/donnie+saxe.jpg" border="0" /></a> <br /><div>Why, Donny, <strong><em>why?</em></strong> Why, when the Devil asked you <strong><em>what</em></strong> you’d give up for a nice cabin on a peaceful lake, all the solitude you could ask for, and cooler sideburns than Brit McKenzie and Neil Young combined, why did you <strong><em>have </em></strong>to respond with, “Oh, I don’t know…my spinal cord?”</div>The Untamed Squidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16674015797525475434noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6701528370963522384.post-40581958043948390702011-03-28T21:09:00.003-04:002011-03-28T21:19:08.743-04:00DRINK UP, MR. DUBROW, OR SLEEP WITH THE FISHES<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh6H7ImvK0wgAxG8gHHxxuLVveOSXztxB9BIuUO2SVAZGv5an8ICjPT8t_hcPIcOaKLetQvaq-UwgAE4kZjh9Sg3vrWkh9L5c2dZ_eKcP4y-r5dZekiSVhVEYsjIQCvfAZGnI-2s9d-2WA/s1600/don.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5589302940075286274" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 300px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh6H7ImvK0wgAxG8gHHxxuLVveOSXztxB9BIuUO2SVAZGv5an8ICjPT8t_hcPIcOaKLetQvaq-UwgAE4kZjh9Sg3vrWkh9L5c2dZ_eKcP4y-r5dZekiSVhVEYsjIQCvfAZGnI-2s9d-2WA/s400/don.jpg" border="0" /></a> In keeping with Don LeBeaux’s album title “A Part Of Me,” a part of me thinks he might be trying to woo some Italian princess with his suave demeanor, his love of the Vino, his fancy Bedazzled dress shirt, and enough solid gold jewelry to set off the metal detector at Studio 54. But another part of me is more realistic, and thinks what this album cover REALLY shows is Don shaking down some poor sap with a mullet. And if that sap don’t get the 50 grand to Don by next Tuesday, then his little sister’s gonna be eatin’ Italian for a week. If ya know what I mean. <br /><div></div>The Untamed Squidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16674015797525475434noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6701528370963522384.post-35989350012557544992011-03-17T21:49:00.003-04:002011-03-17T21:55:40.942-04:00I DIDN'T KNOW MADONNA FOUGHT IN WORLD WAR 2<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg9n9g5ef-7Jq88Yvplwbdg55KkxaQAz6-vPShrJdgaaRFCkFoeYuO5BmJZG5cG2pnvHusEceL5HM09vUU7OACFfRF6UCHFio0ZkDw0PuoyJUup9JNy237X3VzZr0jyBFeFCciHDGBT0xk/s1600/dethkorps.bmp"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 392px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg9n9g5ef-7Jq88Yvplwbdg55KkxaQAz6-vPShrJdgaaRFCkFoeYuO5BmJZG5cG2pnvHusEceL5HM09vUU7OACFfRF6UCHFio0ZkDw0PuoyJUup9JNy237X3VzZr0jyBFeFCciHDGBT0xk/s400/dethkorps.bmp" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5585231580969492466" /></a><br />Well now, two entries ago I made a big fuss over the amateur artwork of Deerhoof, and then along comes <em><strong>this</strong></em> artistic epileptic fit that would make even Kiss Army members laugh. This one’s so bad it kinda speaks for itself, and making fun of it is like making fun of Charlie Sheen – why even <em><strong>bother?</strong></em> Lemme just say this - I ain’t no psychologist, but I’m pretty sure someone here has some breast-feeding issues. Spinal Tap had four of the best improv comedians working on it and even <em><strong>they</strong></em> couldn't come up with a fucking tit tank like <em><strong>this.</strong></em> I just pray to God that they incorporate this album cover into their stage shows. I am so <em><strong>there</strong></em>.The Untamed Squidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16674015797525475434noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6701528370963522384.post-36835483590578736102010-12-10T22:42:00.001-05:002010-12-10T22:45:26.706-05:00YOU SHOULD HEAR HER SING "MY EYE ADORED YOU"<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhoAi6B6NcY-bu6YTvy3W3XKWtLsCAvFUUq6iaLjBymJVDGpFl8QJwcnGmbqkjLHXfuX7OZ4IUXMsUjXRhNAp1lZjBAJRiDn8Cg8u4HpiU0vlyZoFXDXX0NbD238xVO73TNhT8ybThGq_c/s1600/denise.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhoAi6B6NcY-bu6YTvy3W3XKWtLsCAvFUUq6iaLjBymJVDGpFl8QJwcnGmbqkjLHXfuX7OZ4IUXMsUjXRhNAp1lZjBAJRiDn8Cg8u4HpiU0vlyZoFXDXX0NbD238xVO73TNhT8ybThGq_c/s400/denise.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5549265681888954002" /></a><br />She’s right. She <em><strong>IS</strong></em> closer to the Savior. And so will you be too after she zaps you with that heatfuck ray that comes shooting out of her bionic eye and fries your cerebral cortex like a snail on a cast iron skillet. That white rose in her hands? She puts it on your grave.The Untamed Squidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16674015797525475434noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6701528370963522384.post-80561978042636871832010-11-15T21:27:00.002-05:002010-11-15T21:36:40.987-05:00BANANA SHIT<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiucmL5gS11PkRpRFGZADseywIhV6RS7MMDpj-0Oy3M9OntGbGFxmgsXIwRD-PH0O4N9P0fPBj2kBux6YkbRIPF_VJ_DZPxQImAQukNI4qhDhCYtiLzH0iwssjpPfRIyxRBqxh_ib30rnI/s1600/deer.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5539968908130950226" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 400px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiucmL5gS11PkRpRFGZADseywIhV6RS7MMDpj-0Oy3M9OntGbGFxmgsXIwRD-PH0O4N9P0fPBj2kBux6YkbRIPF_VJ_DZPxQImAQukNI4qhDhCYtiLzH0iwssjpPfRIyxRBqxh_ib30rnI/s400/deer.jpg" border="0" /></a><br /><div>You know, we don’t feature a lot of NEW album covers on the Island of Misfit Vinyl because, well, no one makes fucking ALBUMS anymore. And because graphic designers are working with the lowly 5” by 5” format now, they don’t put a whole lot of effort into it like they did back in the days of Roger Dean and Frank Frazetta and all those other artists whose album covers would eventually go on to grace the sides of Chevy vans in far shittier renditions. But every once in a while, even the lowly CD format gets a piece of cover art that’s just so inconceivably <strong><em>shitty,</em></strong> we just HAVE to include it here. Take Deerhoof. A lot of cool kids <strong><em>like</em></strong> Deerhoof, and frankly I don’t get it. Maybe if same cool kids actually went out and actually <strong><em>bought</em></strong> a Deerhoof CD instead of downloading it from Limewire, they’d realize that their heroes have decked out their latest sonic fuckjob with an 8-year-old’s rendition of what a Pac-Man ghost might look like if he were an androgynous member of Mummenschantz and had someone shove a strawberry into his head and a banana up his asscrack until he bleeds. Still a big fan, Josh? I didn’t think so. Now don't get me wrong - I don’t find this album cover tasteless in a <strong><em>moral</em></strong> sense – hell, if Miss Pac Man wants to shove a kumquat up her dot-hole, that’s <strong><em>her</em></strong> business. But I <strong><em>do</em></strong> find it to be a big Fuck You to album cover art in general, which is already a lost artform. So if Deerhoof’s MILK MAN outsells Sonic Youth’s SONIC NURSE, then life sucks and no one gives a shit about art anymore. And for the first person out there who can actually find <strong><em>meaning</em></strong> from this 6th grade notebook doodle, then I’ve got a special prize for you. It’s called therapy.</div>The Untamed Squidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16674015797525475434noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6701528370963522384.post-63435818363790834552010-10-21T20:54:00.003-04:002010-10-22T03:21:43.390-04:00YARNELL'S FIRST GIG<div align="center"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEibitHOv2JOTR_dnVnXDtRBxMRy0jJK5hbMWbMWjyqeuLDwfDuO9HcxoVEd_GJw3v83-a8x0XX2qzt8bdS8uq-ShInwYLv9vgpQRgrQ_wi4OSYt3xijeYNjoNwphtEccegNGI3taieEP18/s1600/das+sind.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 395px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5530668128588184866" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEibitHOv2JOTR_dnVnXDtRBxMRy0jJK5hbMWbMWjyqeuLDwfDuO9HcxoVEd_GJw3v83-a8x0XX2qzt8bdS8uq-ShInwYLv9vgpQRgrQ_wi4OSYt3xijeYNjoNwphtEccegNGI3taieEP18/s400/das+sind.jpg" /></a><br />I don’t know what the fuck the Germans were drinking in the Seventies to come up with twisted shit like <strong><em>this</em></strong>, but while we’ve got this one out, I can say two things. One, this album cover has single-handedly cured me of my fear of clowns. And two, imagine how much <strong><em>better</em></strong> Stephen King’s “IT” would have been if this skank ho played Pennywise.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEioLzJgGtm5xk3hXxMbUUhjQzKHAVBOWy7k4Hw68CmIVYiPxU2CBQtjLZDID4mFL0yphUusEnh3j3UGmlJ9p9UNSlYnqLFDX0J-cyTau0Alc3k5DtojQignvcE-WB1qbwokzduhKWKtYao/s1600/CLOWNY.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 307px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5530767119784467938" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEioLzJgGtm5xk3hXxMbUUhjQzKHAVBOWy7k4Hw68CmIVYiPxU2CBQtjLZDID4mFL0yphUusEnh3j3UGmlJ9p9UNSlYnqLFDX0J-cyTau0Alc3k5DtojQignvcE-WB1qbwokzduhKWKtYao/s400/CLOWNY.jpg" /></a><br /><strong>SO WRONG...</strong></div>The Untamed Squidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16674015797525475434noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6701528370963522384.post-6973907563603302672010-10-14T23:17:00.004-04:002010-10-14T23:25:10.248-04:00MORE LIKE A SOMBRERO, BUT WE WON'T QUIBBLE<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg8-gy_Z2z8lofy4LkixVmW1TW5Ho3CGYjggXk6X4a4Hpviafq6VbWaD047nMD5t6XqtQbU5FRdlrngzIHBzDz6rqm47nzU2PxieJjbAKdOaM2FuLnyhzMlIK3xMrYzkn0KJwFL9Bxjx54/s1600/hat.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5528108422310398098" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 266px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg8-gy_Z2z8lofy4LkixVmW1TW5Ho3CGYjggXk6X4a4Hpviafq6VbWaD047nMD5t6XqtQbU5FRdlrngzIHBzDz6rqm47nzU2PxieJjbAKdOaM2FuLnyhzMlIK3xMrYzkn0KJwFL9Bxjx54/s400/hat.jpg" border="0" /></a><br />Why yes it is, Davy. And a pretty <strong><em>fancy</em></strong> one at that! If you notice, Davy looks pretty <strong><em>serious</em></strong> about his hat. Serious and a little pissed off. Rumor has it he killed the last two fuckers who <strong><em>dared</em></strong> to call it a shirt.The Untamed Squidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16674015797525475434noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6701528370963522384.post-29909243560706071992010-09-15T21:13:00.002-04:002010-09-15T21:16:21.819-04:00THAT DAMIRON SCORCHED MY SHIRT AGAIN!<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiGg5HUcykIMv0Cd5mlhJO_aMjGyEA1KfCnciGlfnSg4mcIiuzp6PfP6135SKc2d6NK4CduU1Da2qICKwCddf3n-Pczd__xLTAojwshtW5aqoi3YI_uz3ugCPD65X9Xfo0i7g47Pr8jzes/s1600/DAMIRON1.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5517313728441442690" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 395px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiGg5HUcykIMv0Cd5mlhJO_aMjGyEA1KfCnciGlfnSg4mcIiuzp6PfP6135SKc2d6NK4CduU1Da2qICKwCddf3n-Pczd__xLTAojwshtW5aqoi3YI_uz3ugCPD65X9Xfo0i7g47Pr8jzes/s400/DAMIRON1.jpg" border="0" /></a><br /><div>I love her to death, don’t get me wrong. Any smoking hot redhead who dresses in fuzzy sweaters and sucks on a Virginia Slim without even bothering to light it is bangable material in my book any day. But two things about this chick bother me. One – I keep thinking of that old horror short story about the girl who wore the red ribbon around her neck, and when her husband finally untied it in her sleep, her cackling head rolled around the bedroom like a coked-up Paris Hilton looking for her cellie. And two – as fuckable as she looks here, and she <strong><em>does</em></strong> look fuckable, I still can't shake the uneasy feeling that she might <strong><em>really </em></strong>be Danny Bonaduce in drag.</div>The Untamed Squidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16674015797525475434noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6701528370963522384.post-90105676241903444002010-08-20T20:54:00.002-04:002010-08-20T21:00:55.892-04:00INSANE CLOWN PUSSY<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEif83r7_Y36QBRsO-GctJ2fNzYhhMc28ZSkG7hl9q3XpNnfzfEXdqIAt82RaPwqFpWuDF3cGpbb4DQGKP4oVcIsCsikqUaPm05PSfH0j3CcLCWbR7ibMyBR4cOlEXHF6aSH_R3b6O24utM/s1600/crazy.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5507661051365834850" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 396px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEif83r7_Y36QBRsO-GctJ2fNzYhhMc28ZSkG7hl9q3XpNnfzfEXdqIAt82RaPwqFpWuDF3cGpbb4DQGKP4oVcIsCsikqUaPm05PSfH0j3CcLCWbR7ibMyBR4cOlEXHF6aSH_R3b6O24utM/s400/crazy.jpg" border="0" /></a><br /><div>Nothing says PARTAY like a depressed suicidal drunken hot jester playing out the last notes of her life alone on a piece of shit piano, right? I think they took the adjective “crazy” a little <strong><em>too</em></strong> literally here. In other words, “This sure is a crazy cocktail party, isn’t it,” means “This sure is a cocktail party with a lot of suicidal mental patients dressing up like court jesters and stabbing at the guests with plastic forks, isn’t it?” They even tried to cheer up this little Harley Quinn by coyly separating the words COCK and TAIL. She giggled a little, then promptly slit both her wrists with a hors d’oeuvre toothpick. And three guys dressed like mages <strong><em>still </em></strong>banged her.</div>The Untamed Squidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16674015797525475434noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6701528370963522384.post-4356903893002139392010-08-11T22:33:00.003-04:002010-08-11T22:38:53.780-04:00MAKES TWO GIRLS AND A CUP LOOK LIKE THE TELETUBBIES<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgFJw9LMW6NrDzUbjKnrj_JXz0353yRh0vcoQVnE0gfU-SBXemtn4Fq-Yv3D9Db8NkmPBUF_aSztBMnBYNmUcUGIKiyJGcxY-7-QlxzQGIYA4UPKD6xOiYoLTSXaiNk7pfc13FRVyJkDhE/s1600/heino+live.bmp"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5504347088379902098" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 294px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgFJw9LMW6NrDzUbjKnrj_JXz0353yRh0vcoQVnE0gfU-SBXemtn4Fq-Yv3D9Db8NkmPBUF_aSztBMnBYNmUcUGIKiyJGcxY-7-QlxzQGIYA4UPKD6xOiYoLTSXaiNk7pfc13FRVyJkDhE/s400/heino+live.bmp" border="0" /></a><br /><div>Speaking of Tuetonic pop sensation HEINO (see last entry), I found this curious photograph of him on the back of a live album, where he's seen playing acoustic guitar in a suit he won on Ebay from Mark Lindsay of Paul Revere and the Raiders to a bunch of cute little Mongolian children or something. Looks pretty sweet at first. Not at all unsettling, like the <strong><em>other</em></strong> Heino album covers. But then, you zoom in on the kids a little bit...zoom in just a little bit <strong><em>more</em></strong>...and suddenly...<strong><em>GAAAKKKKK!</em></strong> What the FUCK is <strong><em>THAT?!!!???</em></strong></div><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh58biEu_4XpkUTfF3dfpL0_M1bgUi90tZV0MLDfkniI3daDz8o_p2g01-lj7BP3eH5Xwsh8B4OcGftRV82stQ5_2lMqpzIAjDsyLx-72xFVV1Q7t9qvSNZUZf_eQ3SdWzPAF74t2j0wjY/s1600/creepy+heino+live+inset.bmp"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5504347177673255938" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 270px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 270px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh58biEu_4XpkUTfF3dfpL0_M1bgUi90tZV0MLDfkniI3daDz8o_p2g01-lj7BP3eH5Xwsh8B4OcGftRV82stQ5_2lMqpzIAjDsyLx-72xFVV1Q7t9qvSNZUZf_eQ3SdWzPAF74t2j0wjY/s400/creepy+heino+live+inset.bmp" border="0" /></a>The Untamed Squidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16674015797525475434noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6701528370963522384.post-40685370519615042512010-08-09T18:44:00.004-04:002010-08-09T18:50:35.471-04:00DER GUBERMENSCH<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgfyH7egScC0yZzUeBTXdOR8qd0N2K1A81bRkGl_32FDZkr5PnD55dW-Zm3Jns5qD4yyIBhs_6wccyQLDu0NNYH_snrKnt6W1UMnVc-QFZCDDQNIp0moUjlw3ur1RqQwmGCWhJUwYEPlxU/s1600/heino.bmp"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5503545524635082994" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 397px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgfyH7egScC0yZzUeBTXdOR8qd0N2K1A81bRkGl_32FDZkr5PnD55dW-Zm3Jns5qD4yyIBhs_6wccyQLDu0NNYH_snrKnt6W1UMnVc-QFZCDDQNIp0moUjlw3ur1RqQwmGCWhJUwYEPlxU/s400/heino.bmp" border="0" /></a><br /><div>For those who don’t know, which means everyone who <strong><em>didn’t </em></strong>grow up in Munich, Heino was an androgynous semi-albino Aryan Mummenschantz member and pop singer who had pet poodles, loved his mother and wore dark glasses because his eyes didn’t align properly. And, in a country that puts David Hasselhoff in the Top Forty, that's a recipe for pop stardom! </div><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj8yxplBD8kF98n98iT2X1RVMUUkvysxAYRKBhf1Zl6D9Q3Edta2ZCOihkR5gjTgLfu83lO3v-vJGBbWrzDu-QmNux9Wtmm2Gf9n313UB6xgwm-pB6oZ9wt-ghQCWQIPFquouFTELFPo0c/s1600/HEINO.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5503545665312526626" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 280px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 280px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj8yxplBD8kF98n98iT2X1RVMUUkvysxAYRKBhf1Zl6D9Q3Edta2ZCOihkR5gjTgLfu83lO3v-vJGBbWrzDu-QmNux9Wtmm2Gf9n313UB6xgwm-pB6oZ9wt-ghQCWQIPFquouFTELFPo0c/s400/HEINO.jpg" border="0" /></a><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgSdgxSDjVYgAZd5L8rUzDNKmrmgu_zl_h0QWZVbl7sccxef5YDmgPH7vFPpZj1voGOKJ1F6QLue2wxhJRxHkGKuh-QdFf-JcX54bKaWFecfbsyAM5KjL34umCc1widJP_MUR-zWWwDW5Q/s1600/heino+back+cover.bmp"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5503545783320633922" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 398px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgSdgxSDjVYgAZd5L8rUzDNKmrmgu_zl_h0QWZVbl7sccxef5YDmgPH7vFPpZj1voGOKJ1F6QLue2wxhJRxHkGKuh-QdFf-JcX54bKaWFecfbsyAM5KjL34umCc1widJP_MUR-zWWwDW5Q/s400/heino+back+cover.bmp" border="0" /></a>The Untamed Squidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16674015797525475434noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6701528370963522384.post-14449030191029250892010-08-02T22:55:00.002-04:002010-08-02T23:08:08.696-04:00I ALWAYS KNEW THE DEVIL WOULD LOOK LIKE BRUCE WILLIS<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhMF7lwLcTMcgSvfl9MC1uDBpGsc17BLFJsHB2lgOiA01gNpPmmwB9AppgB3VCTiZEyHN6b4pncjsGEvDude7argWC3WM-l5khsToN4eIpHiJyUwjheOMYV0WFmX6DXVY6HSD-65vj6SoA/s1600/count+basie.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5501014914958497282" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 395px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhMF7lwLcTMcgSvfl9MC1uDBpGsc17BLFJsHB2lgOiA01gNpPmmwB9AppgB3VCTiZEyHN6b4pncjsGEvDude7argWC3WM-l5khsToN4eIpHiJyUwjheOMYV0WFmX6DXVY6HSD-65vj6SoA/s400/count+basie.jpg" border="0" /></a><br /><div>It's like someone just told them the <strong><em>funniest</em></strong> fucking joke on the planet. "Ich habe ein Hund ohne eine Nase." "Oh? Wie riecht es?" "<strong><em>Schlecht!</em></strong>" (Thanks to Monty Python for that one). Seriously, though, this album cover is clearly the work of the Devil. Literally. He's sitting on the barstool dressed like August's Electrolux Salesman of the Month award winner, forcing these pitiful humans to laugh until they die - check out the guy at the lower right, already dead. Don't believe me? Check out Satan's cigarette. That's right, he's smoking a cigarette, and it's nowhere <strong><em>NEAR HIS FUCKING MOUTH!</em></strong> It's <strong><em>HOVERING IN MIDAIR!</em></strong> So go ahead, boys and girls, keep looking for signs of Satan on the inside covers of your Led Zeppelin and Black Sabbath albums. Turns out he's been hanging out with Count Basie all along.</div>The Untamed Squidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16674015797525475434noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6701528370963522384.post-3279071621342637302010-07-17T23:20:00.000-04:002010-07-17T23:21:15.340-04:00YOU'LL KNOW FOR SURE WHEN HIS POMPADOUR STICKS TO THE BEDPOST<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgq9D51dSb3hg5fF63DHbdFl-GV4UQpKmAbSNBed_1ZbLTM1PkiOmJaGSRpUj43py9rKTZf5pA1XyUH5U9dDciQpw9gmPiL9OPQAisFU6n5Q9-OKf_w3zXZTTUnSqLuWGiwLZ156ef1nQo/s1600/conway.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5495080924141370882" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 300px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgq9D51dSb3hg5fF63DHbdFl-GV4UQpKmAbSNBed_1ZbLTM1PkiOmJaGSRpUj43py9rKTZf5pA1XyUH5U9dDciQpw9gmPiL9OPQAisFU6n5Q9-OKf_w3zXZTTUnSqLuWGiwLZ156ef1nQo/s400/conway.jpg" border="0" /></a><br /><div></div>...so that’s why I’m gonna have to handcuff you to the bed. And bind your legs and hands. And put a gag in your mouth. And saw off your right leg just below the knee. At least, y’know, until I’m through loving you and stuff.The Untamed Squidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16674015797525475434noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6701528370963522384.post-47445114536606396512010-07-07T23:38:00.002-04:002010-07-07T23:43:06.204-04:00HOW TO MAKE AN ALBUM COVER IN 13 SECONDS<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEju1V_hJLnD40kLol-Y_xUzzKgpDTpBRUYVhtZTlBcx4CfaYrOOheiab6EWSiNcZ8LYJVG9xGp02PNyzey-9kNk7uM7vAB0Hv4SjPnOiKfCr0X23CYjrikJDGP9qlK1l4C8fhA2wtkpdOY/s1600/continentals.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5491374947701475186" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 398px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEju1V_hJLnD40kLol-Y_xUzzKgpDTpBRUYVhtZTlBcx4CfaYrOOheiab6EWSiNcZ8LYJVG9xGp02PNyzey-9kNk7uM7vAB0Hv4SjPnOiKfCr0X23CYjrikJDGP9qlK1l4C8fhA2wtkpdOY/s400/continentals.jpg" border="0" /></a><br /><div></div>Kari Wuhrer has a bad hair day. But she’s still hot as hell. I like that they really went all out on the backdrop too.The Untamed Squidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16674015797525475434noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6701528370963522384.post-72986031160906571732010-07-02T21:03:00.001-04:002010-07-02T21:08:59.424-04:00HE SINGS MOSTLY RANDY NEWMAN COVERS<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhf_0giCEKK-6xEk8rHFE5GmXIrO2h4i3gOUXxNddZ4Hchqqm_M2tDkqmJ2oT2i64UYchSnr_13K4m8uHoasvSMUF3tDuD8uJzZwq5yax2Cu6rFuVEBR6N9q4mmJzccLu2EwJah8Xq63gY/s1600/colorful+stylings.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5489479657161686402" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 398px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhf_0giCEKK-6xEk8rHFE5GmXIrO2h4i3gOUXxNddZ4Hchqqm_M2tDkqmJ2oT2i64UYchSnr_13K4m8uHoasvSMUF3tDuD8uJzZwq5yax2Cu6rFuVEBR6N9q4mmJzccLu2EwJah8Xq63gY/s400/colorful+stylings.jpg" border="0" /></a><br /><div></div>Join us as we travel back to a time when there was apparently no such thing as an insult.The Untamed Squidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16674015797525475434noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6701528370963522384.post-77304431178550469042010-06-23T21:55:00.001-04:002010-06-23T21:58:31.135-04:00IN GOD WE TRESS<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh5k6QRUY_5xNqf0ZjlI3QcF1VP-dKrNLpKyPJEnxm1z-hxOdpxjyYy5tIy97GOeKWVWKqPbhF2mgK0DDULlpJCUxOvtsjEu3Wir3OFzSXhfBdrAcAaqz7RvJeG6azyCaMLeF0TTJ0kdTs/s1600/christ+messengers.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5486153708699457922" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 392px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 400px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh5k6QRUY_5xNqf0ZjlI3QcF1VP-dKrNLpKyPJEnxm1z-hxOdpxjyYy5tIy97GOeKWVWKqPbhF2mgK0DDULlpJCUxOvtsjEu3Wir3OFzSXhfBdrAcAaqz7RvJeG6azyCaMLeF0TTJ0kdTs/s400/christ+messengers.jpg" border="0" /></a><br /><div>This Christian family understood that if your <strong><em>hair</em></strong> is closer to God, than so are <strong><em>you</em></strong>. It also looks like Daughter #1 is finally growing into those legs. I’d hit.</div>The Untamed Squidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16674015797525475434noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6701528370963522384.post-1286726866063949282010-06-17T18:24:00.001-04:002010-06-17T20:50:04.089-04:00DON'T EAT THE YELLOW SAND<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhUkzw2mqcAQFF6QZYagMQevaswXsROUbG1ujo3YhjClJLGOUuHpWkThuI9f00TAshizL_JMnNWuB0sczDWIXzZcqYRDroqGVbm2NkdFdrt3csrkutqZrtG5I7zeAQDeEsRkwz62ZsIitY/s1600/childsstories.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5483872573034367170" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 390px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhUkzw2mqcAQFF6QZYagMQevaswXsROUbG1ujo3YhjClJLGOUuHpWkThuI9f00TAshizL_JMnNWuB0sczDWIXzZcqYRDroqGVbm2NkdFdrt3csrkutqZrtG5I7zeAQDeEsRkwz62ZsIitY/s400/childsstories.jpg" border="0" /></a><br />Castle’s finished. Now c’mere, Sara Jean, I need you to fill the moat. What? It’s <strong><em>already</em></strong> filled in?The Untamed Squidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16674015797525475434noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6701528370963522384.post-79788508866470220452010-06-09T23:57:00.004-04:002010-06-10T00:07:21.999-04:00TEN BUCKS SAYS DAVE FOUND HIM IN TIJUANA<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhWBDrpWLKldFTxz9Nz3B1Xj6pArPkB7D8t5619BKhSHYmwC6aCVrx7GTqfQlH7AswreVY2ocJfAI5hjn5gsO6uMnRDbGZVoE0DKOQA4ZJRq7AuFWBZH08IgWM5mWKPIoepOICvo3kCn-E/s1600/chet+dave.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 399px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhWBDrpWLKldFTxz9Nz3B1Xj6pArPkB7D8t5619BKhSHYmwC6aCVrx7GTqfQlH7AswreVY2ocJfAI5hjn5gsO6uMnRDbGZVoE0DKOQA4ZJRq7AuFWBZH08IgWM5mWKPIoepOICvo3kCn-E/s400/chet+dave.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5480991702752399570" /></a><br />Meet Chet and Dave. When they’re not trying to sell you a used station wagon or install cabinetry, they're singing the praises of sweet baby Jesus in the local church. Me, I got a 1963 Studebaker wagon that plays “Old Rugged Cross” every hour on the hour. And a mahogany cutlery drawer with rubbed brass accents. The best of both worlds. Life is good. Thanks, Chet and Dave!The Untamed Squidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16674015797525475434noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6701528370963522384.post-684000747959464242010-05-21T22:57:00.002-04:002010-05-21T23:02:59.398-04:00YOU SHOULD HEAR HIM SING "HANG ON PFLOOPY"<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh1EJpHhD5vBEEemSswcX5xgplP9fV_9lb7yAtgj0tve7Yt-UYUbn2snw0M3bSPyi6P7Xrv7TASjfQ_Tfx0onaHVuRUyPCbirBgJb8r6Wia8eT9ZXaJKSMPzLru6wssZSTkYjhFbkbRG6A/s1600/chad+morgan.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 398px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh1EJpHhD5vBEEemSswcX5xgplP9fV_9lb7yAtgj0tve7Yt-UYUbn2snw0M3bSPyi6P7Xrv7TASjfQ_Tfx0onaHVuRUyPCbirBgJb8r6Wia8eT9ZXaJKSMPzLru6wssZSTkYjhFbkbRG6A/s400/chad+morgan.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5473923450656957906" /></a><br />I don’t know <em><strong>why </strong></em>Chad never caught on with the ladies the way the Beatles or Herman’s Hermits did. Maybe it’s the bad wig. Or the skinny tie. Or the way he holds his guitar. Chad was from England. Or is that already obvious?The Untamed Squidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16674015797525475434noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6701528370963522384.post-46003878228335730682010-05-17T18:35:00.002-04:002010-05-17T18:41:59.817-04:00IF HIPGNOSIS WERE RUN BY SIX-YEAR-OLDS<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhh86guSVHCv0qA4DXK9epV5T2cOcc1eaivKPN937ZhRpenfe3f4XSaxRFXlot2oceG-bp7_ipuy6I4aBNfGu5fWzN5puVJ0FgHgdqzrKPzalFpZsYjF5LjKs-YrspsfzZAZk_9MoM_LB0/s1600/cattle_decapitation-humanure.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5472372947967586066" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 388px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhh86guSVHCv0qA4DXK9epV5T2cOcc1eaivKPN937ZhRpenfe3f4XSaxRFXlot2oceG-bp7_ipuy6I4aBNfGu5fWzN5puVJ0FgHgdqzrKPzalFpZsYjF5LjKs-YrspsfzZAZk_9MoM_LB0/s400/cattle_decapitation-humanure.jpg" border="0" /></a><br /><div>– No, I can’t say I was <strong><em>expecting</em></strong> good taste from a band called Cattle Decapitation and an album called <strong><em>Humanure</em></strong>, but still, this loose (bowel) take on Pink Floyd’s <strong><em>Atom Heart Mother</em></strong> is some fucked up shit, <strong><em>literally</em></strong>. But there’s been a movie called <strong><em>Monsturd</em></strong> (seriously, IMDB that shit), and plush Mr. Hanky dolls litter the bargain bins of Hot Topic. And need I even mention “two girls and a cup?” So yeah, shit <strong><em>does </em></strong>sell. But take it from me, would-be metalheads, if you <strong><em>really</em></strong> wanna make your mark in the land of shock rock, how about starting with a logo that people can actually fucking <strong><em>read</em></strong>? This band <strong><em>might</em></strong> be called Cattle Decapitation. But they could also be Gaitleck Pecafilafiopt. Or Gallet Recapacitator. Or Detlef Schrempf. Personally, I would’ve picked a name that better fits with the whole concept of shit. Like the Small Feces. Or Dungen. Or John Mayer.</div>The Untamed Squidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16674015797525475434noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6701528370963522384.post-23341220536734330942010-05-13T21:59:00.002-04:002010-05-13T22:08:57.719-04:00GOOD TOUCH, BAD TOUCH, BRADY STYLE<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjxhnUpqDlFTywh7PoMRpEPFPieY2yCx89zTc62FNvibuW8L8gAJFAEI1wj8fFpBtpVvMS8Wh6Red0nNTtF3Zo6dqSjaUQHaRxLC78lARFZ5xfPmQfA92mRyiSDdKcUtofC4oNUXmq7EzI/s1600/cassius+marsha+brady.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5470941835824553218" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 280px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 278px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjxhnUpqDlFTywh7PoMRpEPFPieY2yCx89zTc62FNvibuW8L8gAJFAEI1wj8fFpBtpVvMS8Wh6Red0nNTtF3Zo6dqSjaUQHaRxLC78lARFZ5xfPmQfA92mRyiSDdKcUtofC4oNUXmq7EzI/s400/cassius+marsha+brady.jpg" border="0" /></a><br /><div>I’ll resist the obvious “nice melons” joke here, and just say that if the sight of Walter Matthau hitting on Maureen McCormick doesn’t <strong><em>immediately </em></strong>make you lose your last meal, then you probably won’t even be <strong><em>phased</em></strong> by the album cover I’ll be posting <strong><em>next</em></strong> time. She looks sweet though, and he looks like he smells like cod and piss and the remnants of the last seven meals lurking somewhere in that mustache, so yeah, it's a bit of a mismatch. Over in these parts, we call it "statutory rape."</div>The Untamed Squidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16674015797525475434noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6701528370963522384.post-71788737914597687082010-05-07T22:29:00.001-04:002010-05-07T22:30:58.199-04:00THERE ARE STAINS ON THAT CHAIR IN COLORS I'VE NEVER SEEN<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiu38WpV5lxTansPox5HATEO4EzW9yRdhuK-rYGR-Ej6eQBYIkXO7mpEZ7Yitu97BC9f716sYx8_9Q-nLATBQsCj-6PdH-StX-SL7U4xoTdV1LE2NkkMBZ6sGeVcMigoz9oSceHrmBNUjA/s1600/calypso+gene.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5468720962593590066" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 400px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiu38WpV5lxTansPox5HATEO4EzW9yRdhuK-rYGR-Ej6eQBYIkXO7mpEZ7Yitu97BC9f716sYx8_9Q-nLATBQsCj-6PdH-StX-SL7U4xoTdV1LE2NkkMBZ6sGeVcMigoz9oSceHrmBNUjA/s400/calypso+gene.jpg" border="0" /></a><br /><div>Is it just me, or does anyone <strong><em>else</em></strong> think that the three-armed, paunch-battling Calypso Gene probably smells like some unholy combination of patchouli, fried chicken and weed in real life? As a matter of fact, the actual <strong><em>album cover</em></strong> itself has a foul sweat-and-baby-oil-on-leather smell, to be perfectly honest. On the plus side, that’s the kind of bitchin’ ass chair you could slap an “Eames” reference on and get a couple <strong><em>grand</em></strong> for on Ebay. </div>The Untamed Squidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16674015797525475434noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6701528370963522384.post-59541036018283430392010-05-05T20:24:00.002-04:002010-05-05T20:39:29.198-04:00SO LITTLE TIME, SO MANY NOTES TO BEND<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj3sKFbmsorHvh1Df2TiTD5MKbqUH9-Xyd3VaEWfKtVx-pOvLtlsICw4i-yMQ1-ON4Ha2Gf1uRysfaHeIWmueKaX8NvLGPC-4yWnYF0Gh7z3lxRNZUneh_JVAuZFFOJrOTWPzzAJD4ctjE/s1600/calvary.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5467946707293544162" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 400px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj3sKFbmsorHvh1Df2TiTD5MKbqUH9-Xyd3VaEWfKtVx-pOvLtlsICw4i-yMQ1-ON4Ha2Gf1uRysfaHeIWmueKaX8NvLGPC-4yWnYF0Gh7z3lxRNZUneh_JVAuZFFOJrOTWPzzAJD4ctjE/s400/calvary.jpg" border="0" /></a><br /><div>Well Sweet Baby <strong><em>Jesus</em></strong>, Mildred! If you think you can jam on “Old Rugged Cross” with a simple <strong><em>Fender,</em></strong> you’ve got another thing coming. That’s why I use my custom-made Gibson twin-neck EDS-1275, the same one Jimmy Page used on “The Song Remains the Same” and “Stairway to Heaven,” bless his soul. So yeah, you can go fuck yourself.</div>The Untamed Squidhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16674015797525475434noreply@blogger.com0