SHE'S HER OWN WINGMAN

Like a still from some freakish 80's Indonesian horror film, this album cover's sending some seriously mixed messages. There's that hot as fuck Latina dancer who's really getting INTO her cha-cha, hair wildly flailing around, in some sort of oddly sexy semi stooping pose on the right, like she's just about to give you a glass bottom boat or something. I like how the costume they made her wear is obviously smaller than the bathing suit she regularly tans with, which explains why a) she's got thsoe sexy tan lines on her upper thighs on the right, and b) she appears to be readjusting something on the left. But don't get too attracted to Senorita CamelToe, because all of a sudden her GIANT DISEMBODIED HEAD comes SWOOPING down out of the sky behind her like a giant buzz kill and stares you down until you finally get the hit and go hit on another desperate housewife at the other end of the martini bar. If this were Indonesian cinema, she'd have a spinal cord and her entrails hanging down below her head. Damn, why is evil always so beautiful?

TINO LA TINO AND HIS ORCHESTRA, CHA CHA CHA LP, CROWN LABEL